A wooden house needs periodic repainting. The painters began their work yesterday. They came early in the morning (8 is early in the morning for me) and worked all morning. I cooked them lunch; they assured me that my cooking is fine and that they ate their full. They worked all afternoon and left around 5, having done a good day's work.
Same this morning. At 11:40, while the rice was cooking and I was talking on the phone to Ling, they snuck out the back way and removed themselves to a restaurant for a long lunch. They did not return to the job until the danger of my cuisine was past.
Maybe they don't like bitter melon with mountain pepper?
Thursday, June 29, 2006
Bush is so cute. From the news:
President Bush on Monday sharply condemned the disclosure of a program to secretly monitor the financial transactions of suspected terrorists. "The disclosure of this program is disgraceful," he said.
"For people to leak that program and for a newspaper to publish it does great harm to the United States of America," Bush said, jabbing his finger for emphasis. He said the disclosure of the program "makes it harder to win this war on terror."
See, it's ok for Rove to name CIA agents, that doesn't matter in the war on terror~~
Bush signs laws with one hand and contravenesthose very laws with the other, and has challenged more than 750 statutes passed by Congress, far more than any other president. The White House does not dispute that number. It's the War on Terror, see? That's why we absolutely have to drill for oil in the arctic, and if you don't agree, you must hate America and want the terrorists to win.
On another front, customs official found Our Hero Rush Limbaugh with a bunch of Viagra that was not in his name. Maybe it was for the White House? Also part of the War on Terror. But at least Limbaugh is not using Viagra in same sex marriages while he burns a flag, so he's an A-OK All American Patriot.
What? You think poor children should be educated properly? You must be trying to make it harder to win this war on terror. You think air quality is important? You must be trying to make it harder to win this war on terror. You think global warming is real? You must be trying to make it harder to win this war on terror. You THINK?? You must be trying to make it harder to win this war on terror.
What a wonderful catchall!
President Bush on Monday sharply condemned the disclosure of a program to secretly monitor the financial transactions of suspected terrorists. "The disclosure of this program is disgraceful," he said.
"For people to leak that program and for a newspaper to publish it does great harm to the United States of America," Bush said, jabbing his finger for emphasis. He said the disclosure of the program "makes it harder to win this war on terror."
See, it's ok for Rove to name CIA agents, that doesn't matter in the war on terror~~
Bush signs laws with one hand and contravenesthose very laws with the other, and has challenged more than 750 statutes passed by Congress, far more than any other president. The White House does not dispute that number. It's the War on Terror, see? That's why we absolutely have to drill for oil in the arctic, and if you don't agree, you must hate America and want the terrorists to win.
On another front, customs official found Our Hero Rush Limbaugh with a bunch of Viagra that was not in his name. Maybe it was for the White House? Also part of the War on Terror. But at least Limbaugh is not using Viagra in same sex marriages while he burns a flag, so he's an A-OK All American Patriot.
What? You think poor children should be educated properly? You must be trying to make it harder to win this war on terror. You think air quality is important? You must be trying to make it harder to win this war on terror. You think global warming is real? You must be trying to make it harder to win this war on terror. You THINK?? You must be trying to make it harder to win this war on terror.
What a wonderful catchall!
Wednesday, June 28, 2006
As part of my ongoing endeavor to raise all readers' hackles equally, regardless of age, blood type, tribal affiliation (Tayal excepted; you Circassians can go suck lemons*),income bracket, or color of cufflinks, today I will discuss same sex marriage. O how nice, I can hear outraged screams already, this is going to be a real popular piece.
What's the fuss? One third of Americans don't have health insurance and the White House is trying to pass a Constitutional amendment banning same sex marriage? Our bravest and best are getting killed in Iraq and Afghanistan, the administration is rotten with corruption, spies on Americans, and tortures prisoners, global warming may well doom the human race, the incarceration rate under Bush is higher than it was under Stalin, how important is same sex marriage? That, I believe is the point. There are so many problems Bush is working to create and maintain, he wants the public out of his hair. While he tramples on the Constitution, he points and says, “LOOK! There are two homosexuals trying to undermine the sacred institution of marriage! We must mobilize!” 障眼法.
That's almost as stupid as amending the Constitution to prohibit flag burning. I would never burn a flag contemptuously, but I also feel that there are a lot more pressing problems that should be dealt with first. Strengthen the country: why are so many Blacks and Latinos on a treadmill to jail? why are there so many homeless people? why are so many Americans obese? why is American education such a joke? why is there so much drug use and alcoholism in the US? why has American foreign policy almost never succeeded since the country was founded? why does America pollute so much? why doesn't tax reform benefit the majority? why don't Americans have secure retirement plans? The list goes on and on. Make the country strong from the inside, and nobody will want to burn the flag anyway. A Constitutional Amendment against flag burning makes as much sense as passing a law saying that heavy smokers are not to get cancer.
If the institution of marriage were in tune with the needs of society, it would not need protection.
In this day and age, even normal people can't hold a marriage together, why not give homosexuals a go at it?
Where did all these homosexuals come from, anyway? (Get ready to howl and punch your computer screen.) Of course a lot have been there all along, hidden back in the closet, but their numbers seem to have increased. I think it has to do with all the hormones they pump into meat animals to force them to grow quicker. Then the cow or chicken or whatever gets the ax before it works all those drugs out of its system and the hormone goes straight into your jolly consumer, where dog knows what it does to the consumer's physiology.
None of the vegetarians I know are homosexual. Rather, the people I know who are most vehemently or derisively opposed to vegetarianism are homosexuals.
So maybe it does have something to do with what you eat. But no matter what, I don't think a Constitutional amendment is going to do anybody any good. If anything, people will use civil onions or other means to engage in same sex marriage under a different name. I still think it's just Bush's ploy to distract people from his wrongdoings.
Let's be realistic, how much of a deterrent would a constitutional amendment be? It may even turn out to be an incentive, you know, the thrill of being defiant and perverse. They want to get married, let them get married. Let them have a go at it. See how they like it.
That may be the way: like Christians. If you don't want Christians in your country, the worst, absolutely the worst thing you can do is persecute them. They thrive on persecution, it makes them feel holy and righteous so they really dig in their heels. How many Western European countries persecute Christians? None. And how is Christianity faring in Western Europe? Moribund. Look at all the fanatic Christians Communist oppression fostered in Eastern Europe.
Maybe it's the same for homosexuals. Prohibit them from marrying and it's till death do us part. Legalize it, take all the fun out of it. Ok, you two are bound together in legal matrimony, you're STUCK ha ha ha! That might be the best way to break up homosexual couples, if that's what you're after.
However, some people might object on the grounds that matrimonial bonds are cruel and unusual punishment, and thereby should be forbidden by a closer reading of the Constitution.
_______________________
*written with full knowledge that the chances of a Circassian actually reading this are more remote than the outskirts of Mustang, Tibet, and if any do, well, of course ha ha ha we all know what a great sense of humor you guys have. Right? Right? Please put down that Kalashnikov.
What's the fuss? One third of Americans don't have health insurance and the White House is trying to pass a Constitutional amendment banning same sex marriage? Our bravest and best are getting killed in Iraq and Afghanistan, the administration is rotten with corruption, spies on Americans, and tortures prisoners, global warming may well doom the human race, the incarceration rate under Bush is higher than it was under Stalin, how important is same sex marriage? That, I believe is the point. There are so many problems Bush is working to create and maintain, he wants the public out of his hair. While he tramples on the Constitution, he points and says, “LOOK! There are two homosexuals trying to undermine the sacred institution of marriage! We must mobilize!” 障眼法.
That's almost as stupid as amending the Constitution to prohibit flag burning. I would never burn a flag contemptuously, but I also feel that there are a lot more pressing problems that should be dealt with first. Strengthen the country: why are so many Blacks and Latinos on a treadmill to jail? why are there so many homeless people? why are so many Americans obese? why is American education such a joke? why is there so much drug use and alcoholism in the US? why has American foreign policy almost never succeeded since the country was founded? why does America pollute so much? why doesn't tax reform benefit the majority? why don't Americans have secure retirement plans? The list goes on and on. Make the country strong from the inside, and nobody will want to burn the flag anyway. A Constitutional Amendment against flag burning makes as much sense as passing a law saying that heavy smokers are not to get cancer.
If the institution of marriage were in tune with the needs of society, it would not need protection.
In this day and age, even normal people can't hold a marriage together, why not give homosexuals a go at it?
Where did all these homosexuals come from, anyway? (Get ready to howl and punch your computer screen.) Of course a lot have been there all along, hidden back in the closet, but their numbers seem to have increased. I think it has to do with all the hormones they pump into meat animals to force them to grow quicker. Then the cow or chicken or whatever gets the ax before it works all those drugs out of its system and the hormone goes straight into your jolly consumer, where dog knows what it does to the consumer's physiology.
None of the vegetarians I know are homosexual. Rather, the people I know who are most vehemently or derisively opposed to vegetarianism are homosexuals.
So maybe it does have something to do with what you eat. But no matter what, I don't think a Constitutional amendment is going to do anybody any good. If anything, people will use civil onions or other means to engage in same sex marriage under a different name. I still think it's just Bush's ploy to distract people from his wrongdoings.
Let's be realistic, how much of a deterrent would a constitutional amendment be? It may even turn out to be an incentive, you know, the thrill of being defiant and perverse. They want to get married, let them get married. Let them have a go at it. See how they like it.
That may be the way: like Christians. If you don't want Christians in your country, the worst, absolutely the worst thing you can do is persecute them. They thrive on persecution, it makes them feel holy and righteous so they really dig in their heels. How many Western European countries persecute Christians? None. And how is Christianity faring in Western Europe? Moribund. Look at all the fanatic Christians Communist oppression fostered in Eastern Europe.
Maybe it's the same for homosexuals. Prohibit them from marrying and it's till death do us part. Legalize it, take all the fun out of it. Ok, you two are bound together in legal matrimony, you're STUCK ha ha ha! That might be the best way to break up homosexual couples, if that's what you're after.
However, some people might object on the grounds that matrimonial bonds are cruel and unusual punishment, and thereby should be forbidden by a closer reading of the Constitution.
_______________________
*written with full knowledge that the chances of a Circassian actually reading this are more remote than the outskirts of Mustang, Tibet, and if any do, well, of course ha ha ha we all know what a great sense of humor you guys have. Right? Right? Please put down that Kalashnikov.
Tuesday, June 27, 2006
Monday, June 26, 2006
I have noticed that when I have spent several days at home without going on a road, the first car I encounter I can smell from about 20 paces away. Let me tell you, it's not a nice smell.
This brings to mind Lost in the Taiga, the story of a family of Old Believers who lived for decades hidden away in the remotest mountains of Siberia, where their children grew to adulthood without ever having seen outsiders. In her 40s, the daughter Agafia visited relatives in an inaccessible village deep in another pocket of the Siberian forest. She did not like the awful stench, and covered her nose with a handkerchief, complaining, "An automobile went through this morning – there is the smell of gasoline." One car for miles around, and she still couldn't stand the smell in the late afternoon.
What about city dwellers, who are surrounded by hundreds, even thousands, of cars all day long, day after day, year after year?久入鮑魚之肆，不聞其臭. But how good can that be for your health?
In the mountains, I frequently smell someone smoking long before I see him. Especially if you've got a heavy smoker, someone who's been smoking for years and his lungs are rotting in his chest, depending on the direction of the wind, sometimes I can smell someone like that from fifty paces away and more. It's an indescribably filthy smell.
I love these people who drive up to the mountains for a breath of fresh air and light up a cigaret.
This brings to mind Lost in the Taiga, the story of a family of Old Believers who lived for decades hidden away in the remotest mountains of Siberia, where their children grew to adulthood without ever having seen outsiders. In her 40s, the daughter Agafia visited relatives in an inaccessible village deep in another pocket of the Siberian forest. She did not like the awful stench, and covered her nose with a handkerchief, complaining, "An automobile went through this morning – there is the smell of gasoline." One car for miles around, and she still couldn't stand the smell in the late afternoon.
What about city dwellers, who are surrounded by hundreds, even thousands, of cars all day long, day after day, year after year?久入鮑魚之肆，不聞其臭. But how good can that be for your health?
In the mountains, I frequently smell someone smoking long before I see him. Especially if you've got a heavy smoker, someone who's been smoking for years and his lungs are rotting in his chest, depending on the direction of the wind, sometimes I can smell someone like that from fifty paces away and more. It's an indescribably filthy smell.
I love these people who drive up to the mountains for a breath of fresh air and light up a cigaret.
Sunday, June 25, 2006
A ruckus downstairs broke the quiet of a drowsy Sunday afternoon. Judging from his barking, Yumin had spotted a snake. I went down to investigate. Next to the front door, the dogs were in attack mode. Little Byajing was safe in the rear, Tlahuy guarded her, ready to pounce into action the moment Yumin needed support, and Yumin was on point, barking furiously was fearlessly keeping at bay… a turtle.
A turtle had crawled up almost to my front door. I put it in the water of the stone trough, and asked it to wait a minute while I rushed inside for my camera. After a few portraits, it lumbered off into the bushes, continuing its errand.
Nothing out of the ordinary, there are plenty of turtles around. What I find amusing about this is, how fast does a turtle go? It had crossed all the way across the tile porch before my alert guardians noticed it and sounded the alarm.
A turtle had crawled up almost to my front door. I put it in the water of the stone trough, and asked it to wait a minute while I rushed inside for my camera. After a few portraits, it lumbered off into the bushes, continuing its errand.
Nothing out of the ordinary, there are plenty of turtles around. What I find amusing about this is, how fast does a turtle go? It had crossed all the way across the tile porch before my alert guardians noticed it and sounded the alarm.
Saturday, June 24, 2006
Recently I have found a great site, www.overheardinnewyork.com
I have my own Overheard, but it is way too late. I visited New York for the first time in years last December, just in time for the subway strike. Passing a group of striking subway workers clustered around a subway entrance in Flushing, I actually heard one of them say, in reference to management,"Those dirty rats!" That is a direct quote, unaltered, authentic, I did not make it up, he actually said that.
Maybe it's part of joining a union, they teach you how to say this properly, and then you are required to say it during strikes. I was pretty impressed. It made the whole visit to New York seem more authentic.
I have my own Overheard, but it is way too late. I visited New York for the first time in years last December, just in time for the subway strike. Passing a group of striking subway workers clustered around a subway entrance in Flushing, I actually heard one of them say, in reference to management,"Those dirty rats!" That is a direct quote, unaltered, authentic, I did not make it up, he actually said that.
Maybe it's part of joining a union, they teach you how to say this properly, and then you are required to say it during strikes. I was pretty impressed. It made the whole visit to New York seem more authentic.
Friday, June 23, 2006
Thursday, June 22, 2006
Wednesday, June 21, 2006
I wrote this in the summer of 1982. This is non-fiction. I didn't make any of this up.
A new restaurant has opened in back of the Lai Lai Sheraton – Mama Roma Italiano Ristoranto Kosher Food.
The bosses are foreigners. I imagine their names to be Moses Vinorelli and Giuseppe Rosenstein. I really wonder how kosher their meat is. Who knows the rituals in Taiwan? They probably just put a yarmulke on each beast before they slaughter it. Or after.
Actually, there is a scattering of Jews in Taiwan. Hsiao Hui has a classmate named 王來貝嘉 Wang Lai-bei-jia, Chinese for Rebecca Wang. She's a Mongolian Jew. ("Funny, you don't look Jewish.") There is a selection of European Jews living in Shipai, near the old GI settlement. They are tended by a robust Dutch lady, Kitty Katts, who beat a drum and tugged a trombone for twelve years in Singapore for the Salvation Army. She's ready to preach at the drop of a hat – Jewish, Catholic, Protestant of all denominations, just aim her at the congregation and let her rip.
I met her at the Language Center (語言訓練測驗中心的前名), where she was vigorously teaching Inglitch Krammar in her indomitable Dutch aaksent, jah. She was a terror in the Teachers' Room. If anybody was smoking, and someone always was, she would demand in loud, clear, staccato jabs that 'dish! ish der air! for! effrybotty!' – nobody ever stopped smoking for her, and she would carry on for the time it would take to smoke a cigar.
One time Richard brought the paper into my office to read in the more comfortable chair. We heard the main door swoosh open, Kitty march into the main room, stomp several laps around the desks, plant her feet firmly, and announce:
KHOO hass der noosepaper! I vant to read der noosepaper, aand I do NOT KNOW vie ANYBOTTY took der noosepaper!
aand she stamp out der door.
That was nothing compared to the time somebody told her the wrong time to report to a briefing. Mixups like that happen all the time. When she realized she was an hour early, she marched down to the Director's Office. He had heard her coming, and barred the door to his Inner Sanctum. She steamed back up to the Teachers' Room. The secretaries could not explain why she had been told the wrong time, so she went howling up to the 4th floor cafeteria to find some responsible person. She yanked the hamburger out of mouth of the Training Section chief, but the briefing wasn't under his jurisdiction, so she hauled back down to the first floor to find the Testing Section who, forewarned by the uproar, had lit out the back door to find refuge on the other side of campus. When I got off work, the briefing was long past, but she was still making a ruckus in the tape lab. Eyewitnesses all swear that she grabbed the Training Section chief's wrist and pulled the hamburger away from his mouth so he could give her a clear explanation. That sure wasn't part of his job description! For months afterwards, he carried lunch from home and ate hunched over his lunchbox in his office, with the door shut.
Now that I think of it, her name was Kitty Kratz.
A new restaurant has opened in back of the Lai Lai Sheraton – Mama Roma Italiano Ristoranto Kosher Food.
The bosses are foreigners. I imagine their names to be Moses Vinorelli and Giuseppe Rosenstein. I really wonder how kosher their meat is. Who knows the rituals in Taiwan? They probably just put a yarmulke on each beast before they slaughter it. Or after.
Actually, there is a scattering of Jews in Taiwan. Hsiao Hui has a classmate named 王來貝嘉 Wang Lai-bei-jia, Chinese for Rebecca Wang. She's a Mongolian Jew. ("Funny, you don't look Jewish.") There is a selection of European Jews living in Shipai, near the old GI settlement. They are tended by a robust Dutch lady, Kitty Katts, who beat a drum and tugged a trombone for twelve years in Singapore for the Salvation Army. She's ready to preach at the drop of a hat – Jewish, Catholic, Protestant of all denominations, just aim her at the congregation and let her rip.
I met her at the Language Center (語言訓練測驗中心的前名), where she was vigorously teaching Inglitch Krammar in her indomitable Dutch aaksent, jah. She was a terror in the Teachers' Room. If anybody was smoking, and someone always was, she would demand in loud, clear, staccato jabs that 'dish! ish der air! for! effrybotty!' – nobody ever stopped smoking for her, and she would carry on for the time it would take to smoke a cigar.
One time Richard brought the paper into my office to read in the more comfortable chair. We heard the main door swoosh open, Kitty march into the main room, stomp several laps around the desks, plant her feet firmly, and announce:
KHOO hass der noosepaper! I vant to read der noosepaper, aand I do NOT KNOW vie ANYBOTTY took der noosepaper!
aand she stamp out der door.
That was nothing compared to the time somebody told her the wrong time to report to a briefing. Mixups like that happen all the time. When she realized she was an hour early, she marched down to the Director's Office. He had heard her coming, and barred the door to his Inner Sanctum. She steamed back up to the Teachers' Room. The secretaries could not explain why she had been told the wrong time, so she went howling up to the 4th floor cafeteria to find some responsible person. She yanked the hamburger out of mouth of the Training Section chief, but the briefing wasn't under his jurisdiction, so she hauled back down to the first floor to find the Testing Section who, forewarned by the uproar, had lit out the back door to find refuge on the other side of campus. When I got off work, the briefing was long past, but she was still making a ruckus in the tape lab. Eyewitnesses all swear that she grabbed the Training Section chief's wrist and pulled the hamburger away from his mouth so he could give her a clear explanation. That sure wasn't part of his job description! For months afterwards, he carried lunch from home and ate hunched over his lunchbox in his office, with the door shut.
Now that I think of it, her name was Kitty Kratz.
Tuesday, June 20, 2006
Be sure to watch this, if you haven't seen it yet.
This was a live interview broadcast on BBC on May 8, 2006.
BBC wanted to interview an authority on patent law concerning downloading from the Internet, Apple vs Apple. The person who appeared on the set had gone to the studio to apply for a job, and through some mixup, he suddenly found himself on camera, live.
Watch his expression when he realizes what is going on. Priceless!
He caught on a lot quicker than the interviewer did, and pulled through magnificently. He has become something of a folk hero, and now there's a website for him: www.guygoma.com
This was a live interview broadcast on BBC on May 8, 2006.
BBC wanted to interview an authority on patent law concerning downloading from the Internet, Apple vs Apple. The person who appeared on the set had gone to the studio to apply for a job, and through some mixup, he suddenly found himself on camera, live.
Watch his expression when he realizes what is going on. Priceless!
He caught on a lot quicker than the interviewer did, and pulled through magnificently. He has become something of a folk hero, and now there's a website for him: www.guygoma.com
Monday, June 19, 2006
"Berlin is one of the few places I know where ideas can make a concrete difference in daily life," says philosopher Susan Neiman, head of a think tank, the Einstein Forum. (Smithsonian, 0606p99)
This wins my nomination for one of the most asinine remarks of the decade. Everything we do is the result of an idea; turn left at the next intersection, apply for a loan, have another cup of coffee, take the dog out for a walk, build a spaceship, carve a statue, step on a cockroach, pick up a bite to eat, design new software, take out the garbage, compose music, turn off that desk lamp, blow up a bridge, sharpen a pencil, which one is not begotten by an idea?
Or maybe the exalted Head of the Think Tank supposes that if it hasn't been presented at a symposium by someone with an advanced academic degree it does not merit the title idea?
I just hope the remark was taken out of context. One Richard Rorty is more than enough for this world.
(note: RR is an academic in Virginia or somewhere who delights in fatuous pronouncements such as 'The brain is the most relevant organ we have.')
This wins my nomination for one of the most asinine remarks of the decade. Everything we do is the result of an idea; turn left at the next intersection, apply for a loan, have another cup of coffee, take the dog out for a walk, build a spaceship, carve a statue, step on a cockroach, pick up a bite to eat, design new software, take out the garbage, compose music, turn off that desk lamp, blow up a bridge, sharpen a pencil, which one is not begotten by an idea?
Or maybe the exalted Head of the Think Tank supposes that if it hasn't been presented at a symposium by someone with an advanced academic degree it does not merit the title idea?
I just hope the remark was taken out of context. One Richard Rorty is more than enough for this world.
(note: RR is an academic in Virginia or somewhere who delights in fatuous pronouncements such as 'The brain is the most relevant organ we have.')
Sunday, June 18, 2006
The other day I was in the city for class. The place I ate dinner had the tv on to the World Cup, with thousands of people getting hysterical about the game. The game, it's just a game, for Pete's sake!
I've never been one to get excited (or for that matter even care much) about watching other people play games. For some reason, as I was eating dinner and glancing at the screen from time to time, I kept flashing on a night long ago in Dalat, in the central highlands of Viet Nam during the war. I don't know why, but nights in the tropics seem darker:: pitch black:: there was a light drizzle, I was groping my way along the street to my friend's place where I was staying, when I met an ARVN patrol heading out into the pitch black night. I was in the town, they were heading out of town. They had ponchos on, and water dripped down their faces. They held their fingers on their triggers, ready to fight, if only they could see the enemy. They were walking forward steadily, without emotion, into the night, and I was thinking, jeeezus, that's dangerous! They simply had no way of knowing if they would survive the next thirty seconds.
I don't want to get on my high horse or anything, and it's fine to enjoy watching trained athletes perform, but shouldn't there be some sort of sense of proportion? It's just a game.
I've never been one to get excited (or for that matter even care much) about watching other people play games. For some reason, as I was eating dinner and glancing at the screen from time to time, I kept flashing on a night long ago in Dalat, in the central highlands of Viet Nam during the war. I don't know why, but nights in the tropics seem darker:: pitch black:: there was a light drizzle, I was groping my way along the street to my friend's place where I was staying, when I met an ARVN patrol heading out into the pitch black night. I was in the town, they were heading out of town. They had ponchos on, and water dripped down their faces. They held their fingers on their triggers, ready to fight, if only they could see the enemy. They were walking forward steadily, without emotion, into the night, and I was thinking, jeeezus, that's dangerous! They simply had no way of knowing if they would survive the next thirty seconds.
I don't want to get on my high horse or anything, and it's fine to enjoy watching trained athletes perform, but shouldn't there be some sort of sense of proportion? It's just a game.
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