找到兩張非常珍貴的照片。第一張是在臺灣博物館看到的，陳耿彬(1921 ~ 1967)拍的。

第二張在網路上找到的(LINK)，林權助(1922 ~ 1977)民國四十三年在南投廬山拍的。

仔細看，角度不太一樣。我猜想，兩位年齡相仿，都是臺中人；當年在臺灣從事攝影的人不多，應該是朋友吧。一起到霧社(有人說春陽部落)，並肩拍照，兩個三角架排在一起，前後拍照吧。

兩位文面獵人，兩隻獵狗，斗幹中有小朋友，年齡跟我差不多！兩張照片很多細節，很難得的紀錄：謝謝這兩位攝影師，也謝謝兩位賽德克。

I stumbled across two marvelous photographs, taken in 1954 in the mountains in central Taiwan, of hunters from the Sediq tribe. There is a wealth of detail in the photos, from the facial tattoos to the woven clothing. The first was taken by Chen Kengpin (1921 ~ 1967), the second by Lin Chuanchu (1922 ~ 1977), photographers from Taichung. I haven’t found records, but I suspect they were friends, and took these photos together.

昨晚回家時，下垂小樹枝擋路，枝上棲一隻小小的領角鴞，非常可愛！伸手可及，一直看著我們，一點也不怕生，還很有耐心等我們拍照。阿彌陀佛，小朋友，常回來看我們！Coming home last night, I was blocked by a thin branch hanging oddly across the path. I was quite surprised to find myself looking at an adorable little scops owl, perched on the branch, easily within reach. It patiently posed for photo after photo. Amitabha, little friend, come back to see us again!

林則徐轉世了！六三禁菸節，四卅禁牙節。A difficult but great step in saving elephants and rhinoceroses. Officials in Kenya burned 105 tons of elephant ivory, 1.35 tons of rhino horn, animal skins, and sandalwood, medicinal bark, and other contraband products. Kenya Wildlife Service Director General Kitili Mbathi said. "The only value of the ivory is tusks on a live elephant." Hear, hear!

LINK

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蛇很有耐心，可以靜止不動很久，但若要快，速度閃電快。看到門前一條蛇來訪，出去打招呼，Ksasan聽到我出來了，她來看我要不要玩，看到蛇就很有興趣。蛇離場。Snakes can remain immobile for a long time, but when they want to move, they are lightning. I saw a snake outside the front door. I went out for a closer look. Ksasan heard the door open and came to see if I wanted to play. The snake took off.

A reconstruction of music from the middle ages.

LINK

蛇維護生態。如果沒有蛇，我們人類遭殃了。

如果你在臺灣爬過山，你一定曾在近距離與蛇邂逅，只是你可能不知道。蛇在草叢、在枯葉行走是沒有聲音的。如果你聽到蛇，是蛇放出聲音跟你打招呼。

今天到外面，聽到竹簧有聲音，一條過山刀過山，至少一百八十公分。很美！

Snakes can glide silently across brittle dead leaves. If you hear a snake, it made a sound for you to hear.

This afternoon I was outside. I heard a noise by some bamboo. There was a Big Eyed Rat Snake (Zaocys dhumnades), at least 180cm long, passing by. Isn’t this a beauty!

Former House Speaker Hastert is facing up to six months in prison for illegal payments to one of the boys he raped when he was a wrestling coach (LINK). He says that he doesn’t want to go to jail because he has “suffered enough.” He has “acknowledged” but not apologized for raping teenaged boys.

He has his backers, such as Rep Tom DeLay of Texas, who has called Hastert a man of integrity and strong faith. Well, that’s a powerful recommendation that carries great moral authority, seeing as it comes from a man who managed to overturn his conviction for money laundering (LINK)

Come on, let’s be realistic. If Hastert was still a high school wrestling coach, he’d be lucky if the local people didn’t lynch him, and would be sure to spend decades enjoying his position in a penitentiary as a known child molester. Should his sentence be reduced simply because he acquired political clout?

Should, not will. Should, absolutely not. Will, very likely.

I was raised a Lutheran, so I grew up reading the Bible carefully. Of course I left the church years ago, so my memory may be hazy, but I disremember Jesus saying, Violence solves problems, or, Honor the Second Amendment above the Sixth Commandment, or, Carry weapons when you come to worship.

LINK

點進去探索吧! This is wonderful. You can click in and explore.

Egyptian tomb LINK

赴華山藝文區臺灣文博會。To commemorate the 400^th anniversary of the death of William (“The Bard”) Shakespeare, we went to the Huashan Cultural Center to visit Ljuyan at the Taiwan Creative Expo. One has nothing to do with the other, but one excuse is as good as another.

外面一大群人野餐。臺上一個極其顛覆傳統的樂團演奏：鼓的節奏與吉他不同，吉他打破我們對旋律、音準的期許，女歌手創出自己的路，勇敢地立于鼓、吉他之外，也很瀟灑地、即興唱出自己獨特的音準、節拍 ，完全擺脫「旋律」的束縛，真是難得。越難得越好。Outside there was a huge crowd picnicking. An amazingly avant garde band was playing: the drum was in a different realm from the guitars, and together they broke down our expectations of melody and tune. The singer bravely took her own route, totally divorced from the drummer and guitarists, and spontaneously created her own intonation and beat, freeing herself entirely from the constricts of melody, truly a unique performance. I hope.

A fascinating journey into 17^th century London, before the Great Fire. These are the streets that Shakespeare, Sir Walter Raleigh, and Sir Francis Drake would have been familiar with.

LINK

網路上看到一篇國外的報導，說全世界都有臺灣詐欺集團，還感謝中共為民除害。中午在小餐廳吃飯，心中正在唏噓，聽到隔壁桌，兩個三十來歲的上班男性，甲問乙有沒有衛生紙，乙得意說，「很多！衛生紙、面紙，我都拿辦公室的，我根本不用花錢買！」

網路盛傳大陸順口溜，這還怪誰？

十個台胞九個騙，還有一個當教練；

十萬台胞九萬騙，還有一萬在訓練；

藍綠名嘴當教練，總部設在立法院；

肯亞印尼菲律賓，處處都有連鎖店；　　

狂發簡訊打電話，誓把大陸搜刮遍；

核心技術不外流，台灣騙術有夠賤；

如果被抓不要怕，遣回台灣繼續騙；

法官輕放滅天理，下流無恥不要臉；

立委瞎挺還敢辯，法務部長照樣電；

大家跟我一起唸，只要不怕討人厭；

坑爹騙娘無上限，保你發財賽火箭；

歡迎加入詐騙鍊，得手有錢氣勢燄；

禮義廉恥全不見，啊，台灣經驗真驚艷。

A brave man saved four hundred thousand ancient manuscripts from mad dogs in Timbuktu.

LINK

Just an iguana out for a swim.

我小時候，噴射機時代來到了，很多美國人到歐洲觀光。不久聲浪彈回美國，歐洲人認為美國人沒水準，不懂文化，財大氣粗，不歡迎。

我十幾歲時，日本開放國民出國觀光，很快就引起公憤：全世界認為日本人很沒水準，文化水準太差，講話又大聲，不懂禮貌，財大氣粗，加上日本人出國一定要買醉、買春，不歡迎這種沒水準的觀光客。

我大約三十歲時，中華民國開放觀光護照，國民可以出國觀光。很快就引起公憤：全世界認為臺灣人沒水準，講話太大聲，文化水準低，不懂禮貌，財大氣粗，不歡迎。

這幾年中華人民共和國開放出國觀光，真沒想到吧，很快就引起公憤：很多人認為大陸人沒水準，財大氣粗，不歡迎。

這裏又出現了一個很有趣的雙重標準。蔡英文競選時「保證」來臺的陸客不會減少；一度我還佩服她，看樣子已經與北京周旋，耍出一點政治手挽。選舉後幾天，大陸宣布來臺陸客要減三分之一。選舉前開的支票顯然是空頭支票，引起了公憤嗎？哈哈，只有國民黨做的事才要引起公憤，很多人馬上站出來說，減的好！全不要來最好，我們喝西北風照樣可以喝飽。

有那麼簡單嗎？過中正紀念堂，可以看到很多遊覽車帶陸客玩。遊覽車公司是臺灣的，司機也是臺灣的。假如陸客銳減，遊覽車的生意必然受影響，司機之外，會波及周邊還很多人會：保養遊覽車的廠、員工，堤共輪胎、零件的員工、遊覽車的會計等員工等等。喊「減的好！」也許很爽，可是這些人還要吃飯。

有人罵陸客，說一名德國客人來臺的消費，可以敵過三個陸客。很好，但是有沒有注意到一個問題？我在很多地方遇過陸客，很少遇到德國客人：人家 不想來臺灣。買春的到泰國，看風景的到大陸，臺灣能吸引多少歐洲遊客？通常是常出國、有經驗的遊客把亞洲走得差不多了才會想到臺灣。請比較墾丁與海南三亞：不管沙灘、大飯店、價錢，你是歐洲客人，你會選哪一個？這是很現實的問題。遊客沒有義務來臺灣玩。提一下：臺灣遊客出國常逛書店嗎？這幾年，我幾乎每次逛台北的書店，一定會遇到陸客(陸客真是沒水準齁！)，看他們買不少書。如果陸客不來，看樣子臺北很多書店的收入也會受很大的影響。他們願意被犧牲嗎？

臺灣一個很大的問題是，很難就事論事，只管罵，很少冷靜探索，只管反對， 極少建設性建議。一定要把「黨」的利益擺在第一。這樣很難進步。

So what I’m going to do is rent out your place to somebody, taking their money and giving them a real, official lease, and you have to let them stay. Isn’t that great!?

Does that make any sense to you? Sure doesn’t to me!

LINK

How awkward. The brother of President-Elect Tsai has popped up in the Panama Papers. 我們小老百姓要乖乖納稅，但是如果很有錢，可以找專門逃稅的律師、顧問：給他一百萬，他幫你規避一千萬的稅，很划算！你我找不到這種律師，但是很有錢的人知道門路。

最近巴拿馬一家專門幫人逃稅、洗錢的律師事務所的秘密文件曝光，就是所謂的Panama Papers。有趣的是，臺灣也有人在名單上，就是蔡瀛陽，蔡英文的哥哥是也。也許純屬巧合吧。蔡家律師解釋公司是投資使用，現在已經沒有營業。好吧。

但是，總覺得有雙重標準。如果馬英九的甚麼親戚在名單上，一定是頭條新聞，天天大做文章，很多人在臉書盡其能事把他罵的越難聽越爽。但是蔡英文的哥哥嘛，純屬巧合吧，律師一萬五千個客戶都在逃稅，我想蔡哥哥應該是投資而已，我們來看看影星有沒有緋聞。

LINK

巳時，蟬始鳴 The first cicada has announced 

the coming of summer.

兩年沒射箭，拇指肉都軟了。

We haven't shot for two years. My thumb is all soft.

Announcing a new concept in aviation: Peach Airways! ----just watch the video, you'll be able to figure it out. April 1st 2016 | Peach Aviation (樂桃航空)

link

An amazing announcement, too good to be true.

記得歌星劉文正嗎？

我朋友是。。電視台新聞主編，今晚新聞要爆料，劉文正要回來擔任文化部長。

而更有趣的是，劉是某一位重要人物少女時期的偶像，這麼多年沒結婚，原來劉是她的秘密情人。

如今，事業有成，今天的半年後，10月1日，他們要在101頂樓舉行結婚典禮：

為了慶祝，每位納稅人可以領一瓶香檳！

大家等著看好戲！！

💃🏽🐵💃🏽

😁😜😁

🐵💃🏽🐵

Who needs April Fools when Trump is on the loose? He is the original fool, year round.

LINK

Apparently nowadays they are setting up 

“historical markers” for totally absurd myths.

     One of the most brutal, sadistic rulers in Chinese history was the Deposed Emperor Liu Tzeye (宋廢帝劉子業 449 – 466), who ascended to the throne at the age of 15. For fun, he gave his uncles names such as殺王 King Killer or 賊王 King Thief. One uncle, 劉彧Liu Yü, was fat, so the Emperor had him stripped naked, thrown into a sty, and named him 豬王King Pig. One day the Emperor decided to slaughter King Pig and eat him. Liu Yü did not wish to be eaten, and managed to overthrow and kill his nephew. After some turbulence, Liu Yü became Emperor, 宋明帝. You can imagine that he was upset about his treatment at the hands of his nephew, so in revenge, he slaughtered all of his nephews, the eleven surviving brothers of the Deposed Emperor.

   The author Jiang Lang comments, “Power is totally blind to family and relatives. In power games, there are only two roles: the winner and the loser. It doesn’t make any difference if someone is your father or your uncle or your brother, these have nothing to do with power games.” (姜狼著金戈鐵馬p314：權力這東西最是六親不認的，權力場上只有兩個角色：勝利者與失敗者，沒有甚麼老爹老舅二大爺的區別，權力場上不講這個。)

    This is why power struggles have always been so vicious. The winner wins power and glory, the loser loses his life.

     We are fortunate that George Washington, Ben Franklin, Alexander Hamilton, Thomas Jefferson, various Adamses, and the other Founding Fathers did their best to tame power and civilize politics. They introduced reasonable discourse and mutual respect to government. “I disagree with what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say so.” This quote comes from Europe, but it was the American Founding Fathers who first put this into practice. Thanks to their efforts, it is possible for a retired President to spend his days in peace, and ever glory, something inconceivable in days when violence ruled politics. This American contribution is often overlooked, or even taken for granted.

     I am deeply worried that Trump is leading America back to the days of life and death power struggles. Yes, he may say his mind (or what you could call his mind), but he never thinks of consequences. 50,000 people have signed petitions to carry firearms to the GOP national convention! How can an armed man carry on reasoned, respectful debate? The very notion of carrying weapons to political discussion is a slap in the face of basic American political ideals.

    Trump has opened Pandora’s box, which is much worse than any of the supposed ills he mistakenly thinks he can deal with. Time will see whether or not the opened box can be closed. 

Fidel Castro said President Obama's speech was enough to give him a heart attack.

Let's send Obama back to Cuba for month-long speaking tour.

LINK

The funniest, stupidest, silliest news recently is about Trump on foreign policy. He obviously doesn’t have the slightest idea about what to do, aside from alienating everybody and bombing the oil fields (“Now we have to destroy the oil”), so he said he is vague because “I wouldn’t want them to know what my real thinking is.”

He is in favor of Japan and South Korea developing nuclear weapons. If South Korea develops a nuclear bomb, I predict they will test it at a remote site in Shinjuku, Tokyo. (Among the myriad things Trump doesn’t understand is that Korea and Japan have been at each other’s throats for many centuries.)

I can hardly imagine how the rest of Asia, in particular China would react to Japan developing nuclear weapons. But Trump said, “We have tremendous economic power over China.” Yes, we owe them billions and billions of dollars. Everybody knows that when you’re up to your eyes in debt to somebody, they will tremble and rush to do your bidding.

RYAN: You [MUFFLED] mentioned a few minutes earlier here that you would knock ISIS. You’ve mentioned it many times. You’ve also mentioned the risk of putting American troop[s] in a danger area. If you could substantially reduce the risk of harm to ground troops, would you use a battlefield nuclear weapon to take out ISIS?

TRUMP: I don’t want to use, I don’t want to start the process of nuclear. Remember the one thing that everybody has said, I’m a counterpuncher. Rubio hit me. Bush hit me. When I said low energy, he’s a low-energy individual, he hit me first. I spent, by the way he spent 18 million dollars’ worth of negative ads on me. That’s putting [MUFFLED]…

RYAN: This is about ISIS. You would not use a tactical nuclear weapon against ISIS?[CROSSTALK]

TRUMP: I’ll tell you one thing, this is a very good looking group of people here. Could I just go around so I know who the hell I’m talking to?

The New York Times summed it up: “Mr. Trump explained his thoughts in concrete and easily digestible terms, but they appeared to reflect little consideration for potential consequences. Much the same way he treats political rivals and interviewers, he personalized how he would engage foreign nations, suggesting his approach would depend partly on ‘how friendly they’ve been toward us,’ not just on national interests or alliances.”

And some people would actually trust this rust-bucket with the nuclear codes?

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星期天，陽曆三月二十，值農曆二月十二日，乃花朝節，百花生日。大家一起慶祝花草之美，欣賞自然之工。Sunday, March 20, is the 12^th day of the 3^rd month on the Chinese calendar, the Flowers’ Birthday. Join the world in celebrating the beauty of flowers and nature.

畫：明、項聖謨、卉花十開 Painting by Hsiang (Xiang) Shengmo, 1597 – 1658

九十三年三月十九，總統大選之前一下午，傳出驚駭全臺的新聞：陳總統遇刺！但幸無大礙。而有人注意到一個很奇怪的現象：當連戰得知消息，剎那間微笑了，立即嚴肅起來了。

當然，選舉一過就發現我們都上當了，根本就是演戲拉票。說子彈穿過玻璃、劃過陳總統肚皮、打到呂副總統大腿、又彈回總統西裝口袋裏，好靈活的子彈！很多人應該記得當時盛傳「子彈經過圖」，說子彈的路線，唯一合理的解釋，是呂副總統緊抱著陳總統，大腿還搭在總統肚皮上：現在找不到那張圖，可是很好笑。

四年後，謝長廷落選，宣布要抖出假刺殺的真相。但馬英九軟弱，搞政治需要心狠手辣，他沒追究。而我後來想，連戰那一笑，也許他事先知道要演這齣戲，得知消息，心想，好小子，你真敢！

今年很不可思議的巧合，總統大選前兩天傳出可憐美女道歉影片，美女一下子紅了，「我們要支持她！」，蔡英文更穩定地當選，「我們要支持她！」據說美國刑警的座右銘是：不要相信「巧合」。

March 19, 2004, the afternoon before Taiwan’s Presidential election, there was shocking news: there had been an attempt on President Chen’s life! Somebody told me that he noticed that on television news, when the KMT candidate, Lien Chan, was told about the assassination attempt, a smile flitted across his face, but he quickly became serious. Strange.

What was not strange was that with the sympathy vote, Chen squeaked through for reelection. It quickly became obvious that we had been had. The assassin’s bullet allegedly went through the windshield of Chen’s jeep, creased his stomach, hit VP Lu in the leg, and then landed neatly in the pocket of Chen’s suit. Uh-huh, a very gymnastic bullet.

When he lost the 2008 Presidential election, DPP candidate Hsieh was so sore that he said he was going to spill the beans on the fake assassination attempt. Ma didn’t follow through, because he’s not vengeful enough to be a good politician. But that made me wonder, that smile on Lien’s face? Maybe Lien was in on it, or at least had heard about it, so when he heard the news, he thought, Aha!

Then by an AMAZING coincidence, just before this year’s election, a beautiful young singer nobody had ever heard of made this touching video that catapulted her into fame and coincidentally made sure the DPP’s Tsai won by a good margin. Don’t you just love these coincidences? Tricky Dick Nixon would be green with envy. 

世說新語、棲逸

康僧淵在豫章，去郭數十里立精舍，旁連嶺，帶長川，芳林列於軒庭，清流激於堂宇。乃閒居研講，希心理味。庾公諸人，多往看之，觀其運用吐納，風流轉佳；加處之怡然，亦有以自得；聲名乃興。後不堪，遂出。

Kang Sengyuan (active around 300AD) built a retreat a distance from the city, next to joined ridges, beside a long river, with fragrant woods along the building, and clear waters flowing in front of the hall. He lived leisurely studying the dao. Powerful politicians came to see him, and watched his exercises. He took it all in stride, which added to his fame. Eventually he caved in to pressure and took a position in the government.

This section struck me for several reasons. First, the story tells a great deal about the times. Second, it is beautifully written. Third, the shape of the characters used lends it to writing; the only one I would rather have left out was the 乃, which in the script I chose doesn’t seem to jibe. Also, this is a good example of the succinctness of Chinese literature, a whole story clearly developed, beautifully described, in less than a hundred words.

An archery contest featuring Robin Hood, William Tell, apples, and others.

今天早上日偏食，猜也猜得出來，北部下雨，看不到：請參攷這張日蝕正盛時的照片。

日光顯然黯淡，有一種特殊寧靜：沒有風、鳥不叫，只有烏鴉叫兩聲。

漸漸天稍亮，一隻松鼠爬上楠樹叫了幾聲，鳥逐漸又鳴了。

A partial solar eclipse was predicted for this morning, 

so very predictably it rained. 

But the sky was noticeably dimmer, and aside from a crow that cawed a couple times, the birds were all quiet. 

Then the sky gradually brightened. A squirrel climbed a tree and chattered, and the birds resumed singing.

Here’s a photo of the eclipse at the maximum.

今年第一朵鳶尾花 the first iris of the year

When we think of the European migrant problem, we usually don’t think of minors, just kids, really, traveling by themselves.

LINK

深夜奇光 an uncanny light (English follows)

昨晚天上出現了一坨很詭異的光，全村雞犬不寧、嬰孩哭、少年號、眾生不安、丈人哀、夫人泣。有人說，二二九閏日，祖靈垂惡相，將啟不祥。我看到雷棍跪在地上求祖靈，老淚縱橫，我于心不忍，想著辦法，突然從記憶庫浮現了一個很久很久以前看過的東西。我搖搖雷棍的肩膀，問他，「麻禡，想一想！這坨光，我們以前是有看過的，你不記得嗎？」他頭轉向我了，徐徐說，「由紺，你這樣講，我好像看過，可是我忘了是甚麼，因為實在太久以前。」旁邊的哈鹿斯聽到了，慢慢站起來了，說，「你們這樣講，我想起來了，很久很久以前看過夜晚天上有一樣的光……這是不是我們以前講的『月亮』？」「對！對！就是『月亮』！太久沒看到她了，所以實在忘記是甚麼！」皆大歡喜，轉悲為歡，大家回家睡覺去了。

冬雨真的下了很久，終于停了。這個故事只有一點點加油添醋。

Late last night an uncanny light appeared in the sky. The whole village was in an uproar. Dogs were howling and brave men were trembling. People were saying, It was February 29, Leap Day, the ancestors were warning of disaster to come. I saw Legun on his knees, tears streaming down his face, begging the ancestors to spare us. I had to do something. Suddenly, a long buried memory surfaced: I had seen something like this before! I shook Legun’s shoulder. “Mama! Think back! We’ve seen a light in the sky like this before, don’t you remember?” He looked at me and slowly said, “Yugan, now that you mention it, yes, I have seen a light like this before, but it was so long ago, I had forgotten!” Halus nearby also got to his feet and said, “Yes, now I remember, long, long ago, I saw something similar! Could this be the thing we used to call ‘the moon’?” “Yes, yes, that’s right! It’s the ‘moon’! We haven’t seen it for so long that we totally forgot about it!” Everybody became happy again and went to bed with smiles on their faces.

The winter rain finally let up and we got some clear weather. This story is embroidered only a wee bit. 

大概民國六十一、二年吧，一次從花蓮要到天祥，當時都是搭便車旅遊，又自由、又省錢、又可以跟很多司機聊，多有趣！但是那天早上從臺東出發，過了花蓮，搭的車要往蘇澳走，不是到天祥，所以我在中橫太魯閣入口下車，開始往山裏走。

一片矗立的峭壁一直吸引我，很想爬，可是當年在臺灣，怎麼問也找不到攀岩的人。連「攀岩」這個詞都沒有人知道。一個人不能爬，所以只好望崖興嘆。我往天祥走，到了那裏馵步，索性坐下來好好看崖，研究，如果哪一天找到攀岩的人，怎麼爬？剛好夕陽斜光，可以把石面看得很清楚，我真的是流連忘返。等天黑了我才猛然想到，我還有十幾公里要走。安安靜靜的，走起路來很舒服，一台車也沒有。嗯，一台車也沒有，那我搭甚麼便車？這是問題。

走了一個小時左右，有點餓，有點累，可是雙向都沒有車。有了！我聽到聲音！有卡車來，而且是往天祥方向走！太好了！車慢慢靠近，我開始倒著走，擺出我熟練的搭便車姿勢。可是司機沒有要停的樣子，所以我開始揮手 。等車子快要過的時候，我想到我真的有點累，不想再走一個小時，所以我乾脆不客氣，跑了幾步跳上踏板，問司機，「請問，可以送我到天祥嗎？」司機眼睛瞪很大，嘴巴開了，嗯嗯兩聲，微微點了頭，不講話。我很大方地開了門上了車，謝謝你，我到天祥就下車。

說也很奇怪。一班卡車司機很喜歡開車有人可以聊天，可是那個司機好像很內向，不管我怎麼想辦法跟他聊天，他就是雙眼盯得直直的，專心看前面的路，一副很緊張的樣子，一句也不回我。好吧，不是所有人都愛聊天，可是這個司機有點怪，他給我的感覺是，他不敢看我。好吧，有人天生害羞吧。好吧，不要勉強他了，不想聊就不要聊，我有靜靜地看著黑黑的 山景。

沒有很久，天祥到了。我跟司機先生說，「到了，我到天祥就好了，我下車了，謝謝你！」又一個很奇怪的感覺，司機好像鬆了一口氣，可是還是不看我，嗯嗯兩聲。我開門下車，幾乎來不及落地、來不及說謝謝，司機已經全力踩油門，向前衝，開很快！我很訝異看著他的車全速往洛韶跑。搖頭兩下，就往天主堂投宿去了。

多年後，我跟一個開車的朋友偶然提到這個奇怪的司機，沒想到這位朋友仰天哈哈大笑，笑得不停。等他喘了氣，我問他，「這有甚麼好笑的呢？」他擦眼淚說，「那個司機一定認為有阿飄上了他的車！你想，中橫前不著村、後不著店的黑暗路段，突然看到一個奇怪相貌的像人的形狀的東西招他的車，不是鬼是甚麼？那個年代臺灣的外國人很少，那個司機應該平時沒有近距離見過外國人，怎麼可能在荒郊野外有外國人要上他的車？一定是鬼！他把你當作鬼，所以你當然認為他怪怪的！他以為你才奇怪！也難怪你下車他鬆了一口氣！他一定一路衝到廟裏收驚哈哈哈哈！」笑得不停。

好吧，大概是吧，反正我本來就是洋鬼子。

When I was in college, I hitchhiked all over Taiwan. It was a great way to see things and meet people.

One day I was going from Hualien to Tienhsiang, and got dropped off near the coast where the road enters the mountains, spectacular scenery you have to see to believe.

There is a cliff there that I really wanted to climb, but no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t find another rock climber. People didn’t even know what rock climbing was. Why should you go to all that effort to climb up, fall off, and smash your brains all over a rock face? Well, yeah, but it’s fun, you see.

On the day in question, I walked up to a place where I could really admire the cliff and sat down to study the face. About a pitch, at most a pitch and a half, I guessed. The setting sun put the face in relief so I could see details I hadn’t seen before. Fantastic. More and more interesting.

But when the sun set, I realized I was still over ten kilometers from Tienhsiang, and it was dark. The nice thing was that there were no cars or trucks on the road, so it was serenely quiet. Uh, no cars or trucks on the road. Hmm. One of the prerequisites for hitchhiking is you need cars or trucks. Hmm. Okay, let’s start walking.

An hour later, I still hadn’t seen a single car, and I was getting a bit hungry and tired. Then I heard a sound, a motor, something coming, and in the right direction! From the sound I could tell it was a truck. Great! Truck drivers enjoy company and always stop. So when the truck came close enough, I started walking backward and thumbing.

But the truck didn’t seem to be slowing down, so I started waving. It still wasn’t slowing down, and just as it was passing, I realized I really didn’t want to walk another hour, so I ran and jumped on the running board. I stuck my head in the window and very politely asked the driver to take me to Tienhsiang. It is on the way, after all.

But something strange. The driver’s eyes bulged, his mouth opened, he nodded, but he didn’t say anything. Never mind that, I opened the door and climbed into the front seat.  Now, most truck drivers enjoy having someone to chat with, to break the monotony of driving, but this guy was different. I tried to strike up a conversation, but he wouldn’t say a thing to me. He kept his eyes glued on the road. Okay, some people are shy, they don’t like to talk. But he seemed tense, nervous in a way, and I got the impression that he didn’t even want to look at me. Kind of weird. Well, okay, I just watched the black shadows of the mountains in silence.

When we reached Tienhsiang, I said, “Here we are, this is as far as I go.” He seemed relieved, but he still wouldn’t look at me. I opened the door and jumped out. Almost as soon as I hit the ground, before I had a chance to thank him, he floored it and roared off. I watched in amazement for a while as he sped up the road.

Many years later, I happened to mention this strange encounter to a friend who’s also a driver. To my surprise, he threw back his head and guffawed. When he could control himself, I asked him, What’s so funny? He said, “That driver must have thought you were a ghost! Think of it, out in the middle of nowhere in the mountains, miles from any houses or buildings, this shape that looks like a human wants to get into his truck. If that’s not a ghost, what is it? There were very few foreigners in Taiwan at that time, and he had probably never seen a foreigner up close. He never imagined a foreigner would flag down his truck in the middle of the pitch black mountains, so he was probably sure you were a ghost! You thought he was weird, but he thought you were spooky! He probably didn’t stop until he found a temple hahahaha!”

That would explain it, but allow me to assure you, I am flesh and blood, living and breathing. Does that make anyone feel better?

Tom Cotton did his best to sabotage the nuclear deal with Iran. It is a total coincidence, I suppose, that he took US$1,000,000 from Israel (LINK). He went to Israel to swear fealty to his masters, but of course he always has the best interests of the US at heart. Or, to be more specific, the best interests of a certain US citizen named Tom Cotton. 

Oregon is dealing with the takeover of a public land by a group led by one Ammon Bundy. Bundy has benefited from decades of government subsidies on his ventures, including a loan of over US$500,000 which is subsidized by tax money (LINK). Now he says God has called him to go all the way to Oregon to protest and protect the Constitution. In short, he wants to own the land.

Unfortunately, if the land belongs to anybody, I would think the Paiute Indians would have a better claim than he (LINK). The local sheriff has asked him politely to leave and let the locals get on with their lives (LINK). But what is worse, he has irritated the birders, and if you think birders are a soft bunch, you have another thought coming. (LINK) The Bundy gang should really go home and try to do something worthwhile. 

Blaq ta kwara kawas na yungay! 

祝所有眾生猴年平安吉祥！

a happy monkey year to all!

Southern Taiwan was hit by a 6.4 earthquake early this morning. We are in the north, so we didn’t know anything about it until we woke up and saw the news online.

阿彌陀佛，猴年還沒正式登場就猴搞。祝大家猴年平安吉祥！

LINK

Shots are fired, bombs are exploded in Paris, in London, in Madrid, the world takes note, people march, candles are lit. Two thousand some people get slaughtered in Baga, Boko Haram butchers 86 people in Maiduguri, ho hum, those are in Nigeria, who cares, really? It’s not like anybody would change their FaceBook profile photo. Let’s see what the commentators have to say about the Super Bowl.

Je suis Nigeria? Not likely!

Interesting article about which states speak fastest, the least, and so forth.

LINK

Language is funny.

My Puyuma (Pinuyumayan) male friends address me as Ali, the proper way adult males address each other. But in Tayal, ‘ali means bamboo shoot, and at first it was confusing: why are they calling me bamboo shoot?

We were talking with Malivan, Puyuma tribe, about tradition and cultural transmission. He made a particularly good point, so Chao said, “Balay.”

He was a bit taken aback, and asked, “What did you say?”

She explained, “Balay is Tayal for truly, verily, well spoken.”

He smiled and said, “I thought you said Ngalay, Puyuma for spit, or nonsense.” 

迷彩車 Taitung style camouflage.

Slaqi Ulay! 太棒了！ 烏來下雪了！Incredible! Snow in Wulai!

被颱風摧殘不到半年後，烏來下雪了，真奇妙。Less than six months after a disastrous typhoon, it snows in Wulai. Bizarre, but welcome. 

LINK

眾所周知，由于臺灣社會、概念的變遷，二十年來出現了「外籍新娘」。有多少外籍新娘就有多少動聽的故事，有歡喜、有悲劇、有愛情、有憎恨、有和睦、有睽離。我一個鄰居每次開口，他的外籍新娘好像看著白馬王子，用愛慕的眼神看著他，十年來不變；我另一個鄰居常常被外籍新娘打，雖然婦比夫輕二十公斤、矮個頭，但是出手毒辣，又快又準。有的公婆把新娘當公主伺候，有的公婆將新娘當奴隸、野狗使喚。

外籍新娘必須完全入境隨俗，沒聽說過有任何一個家庭鼓勵新娘傳她的語言、習俗、想法，卻一律要求她們徹底融入中華文化的巨大川流。我認為很可惜，臺灣很喜歡說是「多元化的社會」，但是我看到的「多元化」是「與世界接軌」的同義詞，意思偏向沖淡固有文化傳統、盲目追從西方。如果重視外籍新娘的文化，可以讓我們社會更豐富；母親的血脈受尊重，孩子身心更健康；而且會培養出多少雙語的人才。(從小講兩三種語言的孩子平均智商很高。)

請想：如果義大利人移民美國拋棄自己文化，完全融入美國文化，我們現在就沒有pizzas可以吃，多可惜！(當然情形不完全相同，因為義大利移民美國比較少mail order brides或外籍新娘，比較多全家移民；但是新血總讓文化大放異彩。)

說穿了，外籍新娘本來就矮了一截，這大家都知道。比較少人知道的事情是，七八年前政府開始重視新住民的遭遇，開始注意新住民的適應、生活。我怎麼知道呢？因為我也算外籍配偶，常常被邀請參加國語、閩南語訓練班、烹飪班、剪裁班，甚至也被邀請參加土風舞班，合唱團，但是我回絕了，因為我知道沒有人想看到這種事情發生。我們外籍配偶常常被照顧，不定期電話訪問、登門探訪（有趣的是，有一次來訪的是我一位好友的女兒，我還記得她五、六歲的樣子，後來反而來看看我有沒有遇到家暴、虐待。放心，沒有!）

還有一件事情一般民眾比較漠然不關心，是這次選舉選出了第一屆新住民立委！生于柬埔寨，嫁到彰化的林麗蟬投入社會服務多年，現在當選了不分區新住民第一屆立委！這位了不起的女士將善用立法委員的身分為外籍配偶謀取福利，真是大好消息。

For a wide variety of reasons, over the last twenty years a large number of men in Taiwan have been marrying brides from overseas, especially Thailand, Indonesia, Viet Nam, and mainland China. Their stories run the gamut from my friend whose wife, even after ten years’ marriage, looks at him like he’s a knight in shining armor, to another one of my friends whose wife beats him every time she feels like it. Some families treat their foreign brides like imported treasures, others like slaves or dogs.

These wives are expected to conform to local norms. I have never heard of a family encouraging their foreign wife to speak her own language or carry on her original customs. I think this is a great loss. If America had forced its Italian immigrants to forsake their old habits, where would we find pizza to eat? (The situation is not entirely identical, since most Italians immigrated with their entire family. But new blood always makes a culture vigorous, with the obvious exception of the scion of German and Scottish immigrants, Donald Trump. But let’s not get started on that sorry piece of lard.)

Everybody knows that foreign wives in Taiwan do not occupy a very high position. What is less well known is that over the last six or seven years, the government has been making an effort to take care of foreign spouses. I know this because I have been invited many times to take lessons in Mandarin and Minnan, to learn how to cook, to learn how to sew, and even to join a folk dance club and a choir. I didn’t, probably much to the relief of the concerned authorities. But I have been visited by social workers to make sure I am not having trouble adjusting or being abused.

Something that has gone almost entirely neglected in the election last Saturday was that the first Foreign Spouse Legislator was elected, Ms Lin Lichan who married in to Taiwan from Cambodia (sorry, I do not know her Cambodian name; the news didn’t bother to report it.) This is wonderful news. I am confident she will do all in her ability to help foreign spouses in Taiwan. Just don’t ask me to sing in a choir. 

(PS: I wish to apologize to all pigs for calling Trump a piece of lard.) 

Got on board a westbound seven forty seven

Didn't think before deciding what to do

All that talk of 燒餅油條, 臭豆腐 and KTV

Rang true, sure rang true

Seems it always rains in northern Taiwan-oh

Seems I've often heard that kind of talk before

It always rains in Wulai, but girl, don't they warn ya

You’ll mold, man, you’ll mold

Off to work, umbrella overhead

Everything’s wet, I’m soaking wet

I'm getting fat, I'm overfed

I wanna get dry

It always rains in Taiwan-oh, but girl, don't they warn ya

You’ll mold, man, you’ll mold

Will you tell the folks back home I’m drying out?

Saw the sun for a few minutes yesterday

Please, don't tell 'em how wet I am

Don't tell 'em how wet I am

Gimme a break, gimme a break

Seems it always rains in northern Taiwan-oh

Seems I've often heard that kind of talk before

It always rains in Wulai, but girl, don't they warn ya

You’ll mold, man, you’ll mold~~

蔡英文當選了，中華民國第一任女總統，不簡單。未來四年的路不好走，祝她健康、平安。Tsai Yingwen has won the presidential election. I was amused by the New York Times headline, Taiwan votes for a new leader, widely expected to be female. They make it sound like somebody’s been doing ultrasound scans, oh, it’s going to be a female. We knew years ago that Tsai is a woman, thank you. She’s got a hard four years ahead of her. Good health and good luck to her. 

這次選舉有點怪。國民黨好像放水；中南部的情形我不了解，但至少在新北市、臺北市，到處都是蔡英文的宣傳，幾乎看不到朱立倫的。每次出門看到好幾台蔡英文的宣傳車，還沒看過朱立倫的。

民進黨是不是又在鬧派系？沒看到蘇貞昌、謝長廷、游錫堃等大老出來賣力支持，反而是自豪無黨籍的臺北市長柯先生出來幫她拉票。可能也是他們兩位微妙的關係，柯市長野心不小，不想得罪老英，蔡英文想拉攏他吧。(呂秀蓮與陳水扁也沒出來，大概只有朱立倫希望他們為蔡英文加油吧。)

臺灣老迷信被利用的很漂亮。幾十年來，不知道多少國家做過多少研究，證明賄選就是浪費錢，完全不會影響選舉，除非是很小規模的，例如村長、鄉民代表之類的。可是這個鬼在臺灣還是有賣點。前幾天從信箱裏掏出一張民進黨發的文宣，強調檢舉賄選獎金的龐大金額、提拱完整的檢舉賄選的表格，還幫你寫好了地址、免郵資，只差沒幫你填寫「賄選人：國民黨」。用意很清楚吧！我們有多清白！他們骯髒！他們賄選！他們骯髒！說實話，誰那麼白癡，會想浪費那個錢？

民進黨、國民黨無止盡的鬥，或許很多選民已經厭煩了，所以這次出現很多以前沒聽過的黨：不是新黨、親民黨、台聯這些，還很多甚麼軍公教黨、時代力量黨、民國黨、天宙和平統一家庭黨、陽光大聯盟、信心希望聯盟，真是五花八門。有天同黨、大同黨、中國大同民主黨、中國大同統一黨，有客家黨但是也有中華客家黨，需要分清楚！樹黨之外，還有個「虎黨」(不是胖虎黨)，可是好像沒有「狗黨」。但是有中華民國機車黨，我很不好意思問，你們很機車嗎? 但是這麼多小黨出來，一方面讓我想起以前臺灣的商界，沒有人要當職員，每一個人想當老闆；但另一方面，看藍綠僵局已經膩了，兩黨也沒甚麼人才，換換新人算了。

Tomorrow (January 16) Taiwan holds a presidential election. Tsai Yingwen (DPP) has been campaigning full time for five years, so she looks like a safe bet, especially since the KMT seems to have practically forgotten there’s an election. Taipei is covered with her posters, flags, and photos, but you can barely find one of Chu Lilun, the KMT candidate.

I still can’t figure out why candidates need English language slogans, since none of the electorate read only English and cannot read Chinese. Perhaps it indicates a lack of confidence in one’s own culture. Anyway, Tsai’s slogan, “Light up Taiwan” made a friend of mine think she was advocating arson. At first glance, I thought it was “Light up, Taiwan,” inviting everybody to have a smoke. If Chu has an English slogan, I haven’t seen it.

An interesting facet in a pretty boring election is the sudden appearance of a whole slue of little parties. I think that indicates people are sick of both the KMT and the DPP, their endless bickering, and lack of talent. Maybe another little party could inspire people. But the election is already a pretty foregone conclusion.

very peculiar indeed

前不久在萬隆打鐵店訂做了一把刀，現在我把鞘做好了。木頭是莫拉克颱風的漂流木，很細，但不知道甚麼木。鐵線槌平成條。帶子 指織孟加拉傳統麻線。Recently I had a knife made at a small smithy. Now I have finished the sheath. The wood is driftwood, I'm not sure what. I hammered wire flat for the holders. The belt is finger woven from hemp twine made in Bangladesh.

當過五年專職候選人、花下巨款，蔡英文競選總統勢在必得。不知道在這倒數幾天，她會不會停下來想一想：這真的是我要的嗎？

當總統沒那麼容易。在臉書常看到很多支持她的人說，只要國民黨下臺，臺灣的問題都解決了。一旦老英當了總統，問題沒有解決，他們能接受嗎？尤其這八年訓練民眾集體霸凌總統，如果已經養成習慣了，不管誰掌櫃、不問做得怎麼樣，就是照這八年的模式不問青紅皂白指著鼻子罵，怎麼辦？

臺灣許多問題很嚴重，沒有那麼容易解決。陸客已經是臺灣經濟一項很重要的財源，蔡英文「保證」她當選不會減少；她有甚麼把握？當然，如果到現在她還沒有跟北京協調，她根本沒有當總統的條件；可是支持她的人能接受嗎？

北京軍事策略遙遙領先美國，俄羅斯落後更多，而蔡英文說要臺灣自製潛水艇；這種二十世紀的軍事思想，先不談，要問，臺灣做不出潛水艇引擎，如何自製潛水艇？培養工程師、機械師，不是一兩年的事，潛水艇何時能做出來？莫非要做腳踏式潛水艇？

老英當了總統，臺灣還會有邦交嗎？聽說有邦交的二十幾個國家中，有二十個想要跟台灣斷交，是北京看在中華民國的面子上不准；不要說二十個，如果十個與中華民國斷交，我們再也不能在東門看到很多稀罕國旗，生活會少了一些滋味。

還很多教育、環保、就業、毒品、經濟等等問題，諸如此類，一旦她當選，全落在她的頭上。希望她有心理準備。天佑臺灣。

排灣+卑南木雕大師鹿樣年終出清存貨，我買了兩把小刀。有百步蛇的是排灣，另一個卑南。The Paiwan + Pinuyumayan master carver Ljuyan is holding an end of year clearance sale, so I bought two small knives. The one with the snake is Paiwan, the other Pinuyumayan.

跨年放煙火，放完拍拍屁股回去。其它污染不談，連紙盒子也不順手拿回去丟。People from the city shoot off fireworks for new year's and then just leave their rubbish.

Frankly, with all the hype, I’m a bit surprised that no optometrist has named their shop STARE WARES.

I was reading about people getting stabbed in Israel. I have no plans to visit Israel, but I was thinking, Wow, if I ever went, I wouldn’t want to be mistaken for a Jew and get stabbed. 

Then I came up with a great solution: I could wear a big 卍 on my back so everybody would know I’m a Buddhist.

A moment later I thought, No, that might not be such a great idea after all…